News about the bonuses to AIG executives has been annoying me all day. I don't understand about these so-called contracts they seem to have. I understand a contract as an agreement between two parties: one does something, the other one pays. Surely those contracts don't say these people get paid, lavishly, for running the company into the ground; for creating losses; for doing stupid things. Why are these people still employed, let alone getting bonuses? I'd like to see those contracts. Liddy, the government appointed CEO is worried about retaining talented workers. They shouldn't be retained. They should be fired for malfeasance, at the very least. With talent like this you can be out of business in no time at all.
Walking with my “fat child”
Something I saw on Facebook this morning made me start thinking about fat children; my fat childhood came with me on today's walk. My brother and I were both fat children and both of us hated being fat. It left us with scars that affected our entire adult lives, in fact, probably killing my brother three years ago.
Here is my kindergarten picture. I wanted to be one of the skinny girls on the right, not one of the fat ones on the left. Obviously, life in the fat lane began before I entered school and continued until I was sixteen when I took control of my life and finally managed to get to a "normal" size (14). I hate to blame my mother for this, but who controls the eating habits of a three, four or five year old, or even a 10 year old. My mother expressed love with food and most of her communication with us involved food. She controlled how much went on our plates and always urged us to clean those plates. "Think of the starving children in Europe."
If I wanted to eat a packaged cookie, which was in the house, she yelled at me. But she was an excellent baker; most of the time there were home-baked cookies or cakes, which she urged us to eat. Looking at the photos, and there aren't many, brings back lots of memories: the dresses I couldn't buy because there was nothing to fit me. Sometimes I was frantic about it. Chubbie sizes were introduced at some point when I was a child, but there never seemed to be anything for me.
This is a picture of Arvin, about ten years old. He was beautiful, but all he saw of himself was his fat, well disguised in the photo. He was four years younger than me.
I wasn't allowed to buy milk in school. They used to give us half pint bottles before recess for a milk break. They cost a penny or two. It wasn't the pennies: it was my mother's effort to keep me from getting fatter. It made me always the outsider.
And let's talk about exercise. I was a tomboy. There were lots of boys living in the apartments near us. They were my favorite playmates. The only real exercise I got was running around with them. My mother always objected. I shouldn't run around with the boys; I shouldn't run around.
Nice girls didn't exercise. Jewish girls were nice. Therefore, Jewish girls shouldn't exercise. How's that for a syllogism. My mother's idea of a perfect girl child was someone who sat at home and read. If no new books were available, the perfect child would sit and twiddle her thumbs. I don't remember when I began my rebellion; probably with the thumb twiddling and continued through most of my mother's life. As I got older there were several times when she would get really angry at me if I lost weight. I guess I was insulting her.
My exercise now is like a moral imperative. I can't say I love it; I think it's very important and helps keep me moving.
Still walking
The weather the last few days has been conducive to walking and I'm taking advantage of it. On Thursday I went to the Strip, an area with restaurants, night clubs and many old time food stores. I was looking for poppy seeds, one of the essentials for food for the Jewish holiday of Purim, which occurs tomorrow and Tuesday. I found poppy seeds in two places (usually not so easy to do) and bought what probably constitutes a lifetime supply. Robin used some to make a stuffed challah (with onions and poppy seeds) for Shabat dinner on Friday. Today she will probably make hamantaschen, I hope. While this errand involved some walking it was not enough.
Darcy was full of energy when I got to Robin's to drop off the poppy seeds, so I took her for a long walk. I always seem to need some motivation in order to get going. We walked over to Mellon Park where she sat for a long time watching other dogs playing. Usually she hates other dogs and will bark and snap at them, but she seems to like watching them run around and play. I can't let her off leash; even if she behaved with other dogs she really couldn't run around with them.
Friday I walked over to the Cathedral of Learning at Pitt. That's about 3.5 miles and I was very proud of myself. Yesterday I walked to the Squirrel Hill Theater to see Milk. That was 2.5 miles each way and on both days I still had energy when I got home. It's been raining a little this morning, but I'm thinking about going out soon. Just haven't figured out where to go.
All in a day’s work
I was so tired yesterday I was in bed by nine–most unusual for me. It was a long, but interesting day. First was my pacemaker phone check. It's a simple procedure, every eight weeks, requiring the use of an old telephone, the kind with the separate handset and round ear and mouth pieces that get placed on receptacles in a box to which both of my hands are tethered by bracelets that look like expansion watchbands and I'm supposed to move things around and sit and relax. I have yet to find a good place to plug in the phone and put both phone and box at a comfortable height where I can sit and relax. The whole thing becomes an exercise in clumsiness with lots of tension on my part, but it all seems to work.
After I finished this and completed my usual morning activities, breakfast and blogs, I got on the bus and went to tai chi. While there is no aerobic exercise in this class, my legs get a big workout and ache afterward. Then back on the bus for a ride downtown. I've been offering to work in so many places someone finally wanted me. I went to Oasis, another group providing educational activities for older people, which meets at Macy's, which used to be Kaufmann's.
I must confess I had never been inside the store, which was originally one of the largest department stores in the country. I've been reading about it in Franklin Toker's book, Fallingwater Rising, a wonderful book about how Fallingwater was built and about the Kaufmanns who built it, so this was an opportunity to look at the store, although I am sure it no longer resembles the place Edgar Kaufmann built. Oasis, being on the tenth floor, gave me the opportunity to ride the escalators and get some idea of what was for sale. After meeting some of the people at Oasis and getting a tour of the facility I went to lunch.
My volunteer stint, helping out in a computer class, began at 1 pm. There were six people in the class including one who is about to celebrate her hundredth birthday, or maybe it was her hundred and first. She was a writer and wanted to continue writing. She had published her autobiography, a formidable book, and had a lot more to say. The word processor she had been using no longer worked so now she needed a computer. I was to be her tutor. I tried to keep her following the class work, but it was very difficult; she never really mastered the basics, like moving the mouse and using the buttons.
Truthfully, there is a lot of things about a computer you don't need to know if you just want to write. She really only needs to know how to turn it on, get to Word or whatever, open a document, save, turn it all off, with cut, copy and paste thrown in for good measure. But that lady is so smart she wanted to know about back ups. Bravo to her. She doesn't have a computer, yet. I promised to give her my phone number when I come back next week and help her get started when she got a computer.
By the end of the class I was pretty tired. I guess I have to figure out a way to sit while I'm teaching. I took the bus home, had a cup of tea and went out again. I have tiny black ants infesting my kitchen. I went to buy borax, which is supposed to kill them, then went over to Whole Foods for a few other things. By the time I finished dinner there wasn't enough of me left to finish the day and I have to go spread the borax now.
Walking
I would like to lose another 10 pounds. Going back to Japan for a month would do it for me, but it's not going to happen anytime soon. I've decided the answer is more walking here. It's not as interesting, but I feel like I have to do it. On Thursday I walked 4 miles. Friday I sat on a bus most of the day, which was harder on my legs than walking. Yesterday I went to a film at a private school here and walked to the school, about three miles away. Today I walked to East Liberty to the Walgreens, another three mile round trip. I am feeling wiped out and my legs ache. That's how I felt most evenings in Japan. Maybe a month of this will do it for me.
The bus trip Friday was run by the Osher program at Carnegie Mellon University. We went to the Westmoreland Museum, lunch at the Pike Run Country Club, then the Museum of the Southern Alleghenies. It was a nice day, except for the bus, which was uncomfortable. I'm not big on bus trips; probably won't take another one for awhile.
A good day
Yesterday was a beautiful day: a taste of spring inspiring me to take a long walk. Having spent most of my first 63 years in Chicago I do not believe Spring comes in February. In fact, I hardly believe in Spring–most of the time there was winter and then there was summer. In spite of that I truly enjoyed the day. It is still warm today, although very gray, but I will go for another long walk.
I began the day with my tai chi class. Not the class which met twice a week for mild exercise at the health club, but a real tai chi class. We are learning to relax and sink; to walk on thin ice; to ward off left and right; to change the weight on each leg; and the five most important principles of the 55 that constitute tai chi. I've been doing this for several years now. My teacher says it can take ten years to really learn those first movements. My legs still rebel at all of the weight shifting and I need to practice more.
After the class I took a short walk, about a half mile, over to Carnegie Mellon University, and sat through an interesting lecture on the management of culture in China. I had never given any thought to the policies that promoted the numerous archaeological digs and how the objects were managed after they were found, so this lecture gave me much to think about.
Since I came to Pittsburgh I've been looking for some kind of volunteer work that didn't involve raising money, long hours on my feet or stuffing envelopes. I think I finally found a tutoring opportunity, but it requires tutoring reading as well as speaking. So my next stop was the library where I picked up a book on teaching ESL. From there, I walked home–about two miles, and felt very virtuous.
Classes
I was really looking forward to my class on Fabric Collage at the Center for the Arts, in spite of having to drive out to Monroeville to Joann's to get some of the required supplies. I don't like going to Monroeville, which seems to be a collection of shopping malls, because I'm never sure where anything is. I looked up the Joann store online: the map showed the store straddling the highway, leaving me no wiser as to where it was. They gave an address, of course, but have you ever found any numbers on mall stores? After cursing a lot I finally found the store and bought my two items. Last night I got a call that the class was canceled. I was tempted to wait until today and obviously should have. Sometimes procrastination pays.
I've been taking a class on growing plants indoors, sponsored by the Phipps Botanical Garden. I'm really enjoying it. We were given an orchid as part of our instruction; mine is doing fabulously. All of the buds have opened and it looks wonderful. I'm being very careful about watering it and making sure it has high humidity. I don't know what will happen to it the next time I go away.
My other two plants only need water every 10 days to two weeks. That's always been one of my requirements for plants, the other being low light. Only my first house, many, many years ago, had good light for growing plants. I hated the house and nothing grew there. Maybe my feelings were spilling over and poisoning them.
I'm only taking one Osher class this term: tai chi, but I've been going to all the special, one-time lectures. Next term I will take a class called, How Numbers Work. I think it's geared for math phobes like me.
Brrr…It’s cold inside
My radio turned on at seven this morning, as usual, I got up, went to the bathroom, decided it was too cold to stay up, and got back in bed. It is usually warm when the radio turns on; that's one of the things that gets me out of bed; I don't like sleeping when it's warm. I didn't give it much thought, just burrowed under the covers and went back to sleep, radio and all. The radio turned off at eight and I just stayed under the covers, denying the reality of my cold house. I had some funny dreams, which I remembered. Usually I don't. I was sitting in a stadium with my cousin Kenny who kept handing me tissues to wipe my nose, and I was embarrassed about it. I guess it was so cold my nose was running. And I remember speculating about having lost the heat as part of a dream, but it didn't cause me any anxiety. That's really denial. I didn't want to deal with the whole thing. I finally got up at nine, called the landlord and it's fixed now.
Theatre in Pittsburgh
University of Pittsburgh Repertory Theatre, part of the Department of Theatre Arts, is putting on a production of Angels in America, the Tony Kushner play about AIDS and other facets of American life. All parts, with the exception of Roy Cohn and Ethel Rosenberg/Hannah, are played by students. It is a complex, ambitious undertaking and they do a great job. I never saw the play when it was first produced so I was pleased to have this opportunity. With my usual standard of how many times I look at my watch I have to report that I only looked once, at the beginning of the intermission, and was surprised at how much time had elapsed. That means I give it five stars.
The Pitt Osher group had a lecture/discussion about this first part of the play, and another will be held before the second part is produced. Much of this lecture focused on how the students approached their roles and what was done to prepare them, since most of them were born after the time period (Ronald Reagan eighties) the play addresses and long after Roy Cohn was most famous.
Update
The China book is ready to be printed. It has 163 pages with 318 pictures. I thought about uploading it here, but the PDF is 158 MB–more than I want to upload or you want to download. I am putting it aside temporarily to work on my upcoming class, and my income tax. When I get ready to print and bind it I'll post some screen shots of the pages and photos of the binding. In the meantime it's all on the other blog, including the photos I never got to post.
I have finished my syllabus for the first two classes, although I suspect some of it will run into the third class. I'll put it up on Silver Streakers in the next day or so. Today I had a chance to speak to two of my students; both are really thinking about commercial applications. That puts a different spin on the whole thing. I don't know any of the other people who have signed up for the class. I plan to contact all of them by email before the class begins, primarily to get them thinking about blog and domain names.
